Day 72: Secular Vision


When people call you lucky, but they don’t know or can’t even understand your story….

I’m blessed and I always know who blesses me.

The tears have been replaced with smiles and laughter, but the vision you see today remembers every cloud along the way.

So if your definition of blessed equals my definition of protected and sealed, then yes, call me lucky.

If that’s truly what you see.

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Day 66: Lighthouse


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I am the lighthouse. The sailors cannot find dry ground if I do not shine.

The lost cannot find the way if I do not chart the path.

This is our faith.

This is our teaching.

This is our burden.

And, this is our reward.

When the light dims, it is either replaced or it goes out.

Yet, energy is never lost, it can only be transformed.

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Day 5: Conflicted Mourning


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This was not the intended first published piece of 2017.

I have written other works of art centered around my reflective learnings of 2016. I wrote the inspired words and set them aside. I learned this technique awhile back. Write with passion. Write with emotion. Write whatever comes forth then set it aside. Forget about the infused emotional, thoughtful, and provoking life I left on the screen. Let their fire dim. Let their virtuosity wane. Let logic overrule. Let the pain and anguish of their meaning flicker out like the last flame of a well-burnt candle.

Then and only then return to the scene. Shift through the ashes. Search out the treasures. Breathe in the remnants of what remains. Ask the only question that matters. Are the words still true? Publish, if yes. Revamp, if no.

My confliction causes me to break away, if only for tonight, from this writing ritual.

Prepared I knew. We are not a family of jesters. Sure, we joke and laugh at the appropriate times. Yet, we are planners and thinkers. He had been preparing my mother. And, my mother had been preparing us. So I knew. I was prepared.  I was aware. The signs came with each fleeting day.  I expected the call more than once. I knew what steps to take in order to be available. I held back tears with each new revelation. The diagnosis was clearer with each update. Not through what was said, but by what was withheld.

The urgency came. The call was made. The words were spoken. He’s passed away she spoke. There it is. The confliction of heart, mind, and spirit. I feel it. I cannot fully name it, but I sense it. The heart aches because his temporal presence has left. The mind is grateful the pain and confusion he experienced in his final days are over. The spirit rejoices because his soul now rests where no more harm can come to him in the form of “treatment”. I feel it all and I feel none of it. The medical attempts to save him reduced his quality of life in the final weeks, if not months, so I pray his mother and my grandmother greets him upon his arrival as her memory consoles me now.

I feel it all and I feel none of it. The medical attempts to save him reduced his quality of life in the final weeks, if not months, so I pray his mother and my grandmother greets him upon his arrival as her memory consoles me now.

For this is how I learned to express what is sometimes inexpressible. I am a stoic soul with a complex heart. It is here the emotions intersect with the logic to usher in the therapy mere condolences cannot bring. Here my gift allows me to sit in my Father’s lap. In a place, my stoic soul with a complex heart – can experience the caress that does not bend and does not break. For this was not the intended published first piece of 2017, but it was needed.

You will be missed, but not forgotten.

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Day 340: Enjoy the Harvest


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When the fruit is ripe, it is time to take the first bite.

 

 

 

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Day 275: A Prayer for Wisdom


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The dissection of wisdom.

Like most things in life, the first line is not the last line, except, maybe in poetry. {Inward smile}

Case in point: the dissection of wisdom

Pray for wisdom & our Father in heaven will give it to you.

True, he is faithful & his promises are true.

Yet, what is silently hidden in the prayer is the required response.

Wisdom comes through overcoming the insurmountable.

Wisdom comes through facing adversity with limited resources.

Wisdom comes through losing the one you love, to find, the one you need.

Wisdom like winning an Olympic medal is not easy. It requires dedication, sacrifice, conditioning, vision, and follow-through against all odds.

So pray for wisdom, but understand the prayer is the opening line of your favorite book.

Achieving wisdom comes through how you write the story.

The dissection of wisdom.

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Day 274: The Other Side of Enlightenment


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Sometimes, I miss the luxury, naivety, afforded me in my younger years.

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Day 185: The Offering


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I did not learn, because I took the offered advice.
Sure, I listened.
I might have even been seen taking a few notes.
Yet, the learning came from living and not just listening.

© 2016 EYHCS

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Day 183: Distinguished Mirage: Cause & Effect


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The true liar convinces self – the lie is real.
The lie becomes so real it covers the truth.
Breathing fire does not make you a firefighter.
Do not spew venom and call it a cure.
Venom is poisonous and can lead to an infection.
The antidote cures the infected.
Know the difference.
Then live it differently.
And, your life will be different.

© 2016 EYHCS

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Day 182: The Living Shrine


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If you are constantly living off past accomplishments, you are not living, at all.

In fact, you have created a living shrine and shrines are for the dead.

© 2016 EYHCS

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Day 93: Knowing


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Ever wonder why mathematicians insist on having you show your work. Because knowing how you arrived at the answer is a greater achievement than knowing the answer.

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Day 2: A Great Experience


NYE Dinner

2016 began in the only way it could, I imagine… I so love unintended staging.

This morning after bringing in the New Year in a new fashion, I had breakfast with some new friends. My bill came to $6.66. The very presence of the number brought forth the expected commentary. I silently thought, the futurists will have a field day with this one. How does it change after the tariff for service is paid?

Sometimes, a number is just a number. Sometimes it is not.

Without dissecting the outerworld implications of my first meal of the New Year, here is what I know: I left with a full stomach, a full wallet, and a great experience!

Happy New Year 2016!

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Day 1: An Interview with 2016 with a Cameo from 2010


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2016: Looking back over your life, what are you looking forward to in the New Year?

EYHCS: That is an excellent question. <Ponders the question with a reflective countenance>

2016: Do you have an excellent answer?

EYHCS: Yes. <Replies with a dead and stark countenance>

2016: <fully engaged with hips seated at the front of the lounge chair> Care to share?

EYHCS: <continuing to be display a coy demeanor> Sure.

EYHCS: Change, affirmation, and fulfillment of promises are what I am looking forward to in the New Year.

2016: Wow, you don’t shy away from the complex, do you? <Centers left hand across chests in a faux humble fashion>

EYHCS: Never have and never will.

2016: How would you characterize 2015?

EYHCS: At times it was akin to Jack Nicholson from A Few Good Men with “You can’t handle the truth”. At other times it was akin to Rafiki from the Lion King with “Simba, he’s alive!” And, as the year drew to an close, it was Neo from the Matrix with, “I am going to hang up this phone and show the people what you don’t want them to see. The rest I leave up to you!”

2016: Any special resolutions for the New Year?

EYHCS: Not really. I am just grateful to be of sound mind and body after the last several years of testing and trying I have undergone.

2016: What type of testing and trying? How do you define testing and trying?

EYHCS: The simplest definition is the easiest definition. I have been tested mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically, psychologically, and physiologically.

2010: I was there.

2016: How so?

2010: I saw it all unfold. Yet, I could not intervene. It was a battle required to define, affirm, and confirm her true character. I knew she could and would prevail. I just needed her to know the same.

EYHCS: It was hard at times. A lot of people look at me today and comment how together I seem. They don’t know how much it cost to not only appear this way, but to be this way.

2016: Cost?

EYHCS: Yes, the spiritual and mental cost. The breaking of beliefs to conquer one’s greatest fear is an enlightening and painful process. I mimicked the way Jesus’ survived and prevailed during his 40 days and nights of testing. Everything he needed to defeat external and internal enemies had already been deposited into him. So with private tears and public cheers, I marched on, until I could march out.

2016: Do you feel you’ve conquered your greatest fear?

EYHCS: Most days, I do.

2016: Willing to share it with others.

EYHCS: I feared disappointment.

2016: Disappointment?

EYHCS: Yes, disappointment. Disappointing others, disappointing myself, disappointing my ancestors <unrealistic>, disappointing my parents, and if I am honest, the disappointment of never being enough.

2016: What changed?

EYHCS: I watched my former self battle to regain control of the uncontrollable and win.

2016: How did that feel?

EYHCS: Good, no great! When the enemy saw me cower, the spirit saw me tower.

I watched mesmerized at times as obstacles became pathways. I silently praised in place as promises, visions, and dreams manifested around me and for me. I bit my tongue when necessary and raised my voice when required. I feel in love with me and I liked it! I hadn’t ever been in love with me before 2015, not really, but today I am and it’s great!

2016: Sounds like you figured some things out.

EYHCS: Some, but I have only scratched the surface.

2016: Any regrets?

EYHCS: No, this year was all about clearing up old regrets and living a life that produced no future regrets.

2016: How’s that?

EYHCS: I had to sacrifice my personal self to honor my spiritual-self several times in 2015. At times, I had to confront those who only sought the best for me, but couldn’t understand the choices I was making in how I dealt with certain situations.

2016: That sounds deep.

EYHCS: It is, but the deeper it got, the clearer it all became.

2016: Has anyone ever told you, sometimes your responses produced more questions than answers?

EYHCS: Yes.

2016: Care to add any more to that response?

EYHCS: No.

2016: Well, we’re day one in of 366 days. Care to share your plan for 2016?

EYHCS: Tried that once, the human mind could not comprehend the design.

EYHCS: So instead, in the words of one of my favorite characters, “where we’re going we don’t need any roads”!

2016: I can’t wait!

EYHCS: You don’t have to. You already know what is in store. I am the one who gets to discover it. Thank you for joining me in the journey.

2016: You’re welcome and thanks for sharing, EYHCS, it was a pleasure talking with you. Take care and see you on the other side.

EYHCS: Indeed, I pray you will {Insha’Allah}! One God, many names, and I love them all!!!

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Day 95 – The Real Meaning of Easter


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Belief in the Resurrection is one thing. Belief in the Power of the Holy Spirit is another. Believing they both served the same purpose is yet another. Living without seeking to understand the powerful combination they each hold in your life, is failure to understand the real meaning of Easter.

EYHCS

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Day 95 – A Personal Test of Faith


Easter Bunny

Prayer is a powerful vehicle for restoration, for thanksgiving, for healing, for dreams, for visions; but, what happens when all you do is pray, but lack the belief to believe all your prayers have already been answered?

EYHCS

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Day 94 – Do You Believe the Words Flowing from Your Mouth?


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If you looked into your heart, could you honestly say, you believe the words flowing from your mouth?

EYHCS

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