Confession Moment #10: An Artist Heart with a Personal Dilemma


How do you balance a public profile being a private person? I’m writing while I’m thinking, because the subject often comes up, especially, as a blog writer.

Often the stories, poems, and prose are not even about me. But sometimes they are. Other times they are about parts of me or the people I see if that makes sense. Whatever the true subject or objective, the words used to express or describe are indeed mine. So, however, I dress it up, essentially, they are subjectively about something connected to me.

On a personal note, I keep everything close to the vest. I rarely disclose personal details about my life, my friends, my plans, or my family (directly). I’ve been this way as long as I can remember. If I do, then that means you’ve earned a level of trust somewhere in my mind and heart. A level that says similar to how I treat those who share their lives with me, you’re not going to go and shout what I say from the mountaintop. I cherish these relationships because they are difficult to find and hard to keep.

I’d liked to say this originated when I first heard the story of Zachariah in Bible school pre-adolescent, and subconsciously, it may have. However, I’m not convinced that’s true.

I’ve watched people over the years and in watching them, I’ve learned a great deal about boundaries. Everyone’s boundaries are different and I like to keep mine like a fortress at times, if not all the time. The problem I learned about living in a fortress is when you need help, it’s hard for help to find a way in. So the almighty and I struck a balance. He places people in my life I know I can trust and confirms their placement by their actions. It has been working thus far.

I’m sure I’ve been burned in the past, but that’s not what this is about. I am also an artist as I previously wrote earlier in this written dialogue currently happening in my head. And the craft of an artist is extremely public and often very personal. Whether the craft envelopes the artist’s personal challenges, triumphs, or something in between the content is almost always raw.

Thus my actual personal life, I like to keep personal and private. Not necessary a secret, but definitely private.

I had an encounter today with a friend girl of mine who innocently indirectly shared a personal component of my life on a public platform. She was only providing encouragement. Encouragement, I greatly appreciated. However, upon having a quick conversation she quickly understood and respected my wishes that I’d rather not have certain components of my life publicly discussed or commented on overtly. I am grateful for that and for her because others might have misinterpreted my call for discretion. And, turned a molehill into a mountain.

Said interaction brought me back to this confession moment. I regularly share my thoughts, experiences, and beliefs on an array of subjects on my blog and on my community Facebook page. I do so willingly and without reservation. Mainly, in hopes, it liberates someone secretly struggling with similar issues. If my transparency can save a life, provide hope, or simply let someone in the universe know they are not alone, then it’s worth it!

We live in a society where fear, shame, emotional distress, and emotional pain are bottled up until they blow up. So I write to let others know, they are indeed not alone, and most of what we battle are temporary distractions. If my public artist heart can save one soul then the open declarations are worth it every time.

Having said that, I was raised in the church. More specifically, I was raised in a church where every Sunday before communion the Pastor would call all those who had “sinned” during the week up to confess their sins one-by-one into the microphone, publicly, in accordance with our church doctrine before the entire church body. Sometimes these lines were ten to fifteen people deep. And, even after confessing their “sins”, they would each have to stand before the church before he prayed for them out loud about their specific “sin” before they were allowed to be seated.

This practice struck me as odd and invasive. Yet, for 18 years I watched the same people, week after week form a line down the right aisle waiting to be redeemed before as a church body, we could take communion. The practice troubled me, but it was tradition and it was not until years later I would experience something different, so I watched in silence week after week, month after month, and year after year until I was 18th and no longer required to attend church. Did my need for personal privacy stem from this, who knows? But, I do know I had my own silent struggles, I never felt comfortable sharing because of this practice and they followed me into adulthood.

So there was always an invisible shield on my internal thoughts for most of my life. I’m not saying I was muted but definitely guarded. And as luck would have it, for good reasons at times. So it’s rare and special when I really can be truly open on a personal level. I’m not harboring dark secrets. I just enjoy the sanctity of my personal life remaining personal.

Still seeking the right balance between publicly transparent and privately personal.

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“Confession Moment #10: An Artist Heart with a Personal Dilemma” (text) by EYHCS published under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

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Day 41 – A Powerful Trinity Force


Island Sphere

The heart knows what the heart knows. The soul feels what the heart knows. The Holy Spirit feeds the heart and soothes the soul. As a powerful trinity force they create a unifying path to success.

EYHCS

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Day 37 – If You Seek ME, You Will Find ME


Canyon 052

I looked to the hills, but did not find you. I looked to the stars, but could not see you. I looked in the valleys, but could not hear you. I looked inside, but could not feel you. I cried out your name and you came from the hills, through the stars, from the valleys, and soared through me. Who are you?

EYHCS

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Day 3 – The Two-Steps to Creation


For a non-baker, this is an improbable reality, but still possible.
DSC02392

Create a mind full of improbable realities this 2015. Create a mind of greater than ever before this 2015. Create a mind of no more excuses this 2015. Create a mind of hope this 2015. The improbable is never impossible. Make your 2015 a year of turning the improbable into not only possible, but realized.

EYHCS

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Voter Lookup: Don’t Be Fooled At the Election Booth


I took a backseat and only spoke to my friends and colleagues about why voting is so important.  This year is different. I received a surprise at the early elections last Monday.  I am normally an avid watcher of Presidential elections, but sometimes allow midterm elections to go by without a second glance, since the highly contested elections of 2008.  No longer standing in long lines, no longer spending countless nights at the polling offices, no longer rallying the troops to get out the vote, and no longer spending my time and energy on convincing the masses their votes really do count.

We have a choice between a Governor who will keep us in the dark ages or a choice between a return to the days of Ann Richards, where minorities actually had a voice in Texas.  We have a choice where minorities actually matter.  We have a choice where, our vote and our voices really can change the trajectory of our state.

Without pinpointing a specific candidate, vote for a candidate this week while early voting is still going on or next Tuesday, November 4, 2014, whose values, principles, and history in political office closely aligns to a future you want to see manifest in your local area.  Whatever you do, VOTE!

The voting tool below can help you find early voting locations or your polling location on voting day.  Please remember, this year you must have both your photo identification card and your voter’s id card to cast your ballot.  Give a big thanks to the political party of the dark ages, for that one!

To read more about my experience at the voting booth click the link here:  https://eyhcs2010.com/2014/10/25/confession-moment-9-the-audacity-of-public-officials/

Day 273 – Meditation Series: Royal Omelet


The Royal Omelet meditation is the last addition to the meditation series began during the summer and fall of 2010. Have no fear, I have no intention of stopping this series as God breathes new life into my writer’s heart.  Enjoy!

Believer

 

Living a life destined for greatness is comparable to holding a newborn baby for the very first time and looking into their eyes.  In both, possibilities exist.  There is a potential for endless opportunities.  There are visions of future manifestations, which are shimmering toward the brim of a joyous reality as it reaches its zenith.   Yet, the path to achievement is hidden by the trials of fit for duty.  Seeing a cracked egg and envisioning a royal omelet requires innovation and a chef’s touch.  Meet my chief chef, father God.  I once was all yoke and today, I rest upon the king’s plate a truffle crusted royal omelet.

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Day 262 – Meditation Series: Ripple Effect


Image Proofs 064

 

Hope may never die, but we allow our belief in hope to waiver.  It is through our faith in the hope of the unseen we open ourselves for God’s grace and the endless possibilities of hope fulfilled.  Mother God is waiting for your pebble to begin the ripple effect.

 

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©EYHCS AND THE LATEST WORD, 2010-2014. UNAUTHORIZED USE AND/OR DUPLICATION OF THIS MATERIAL, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO YOUTUBE VIDEOS, PAPERS, AND OTHER ORIGINAL WORKS OF ART WITHOUT EXPRESS AND WRITTEN PERMISSION FROM THIS BLOG’S AUTHOR AND/OR OWNER IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED. EXCERPTS, LINKS, IMAGES THAT ARE THE COURTESY OF INDULGY.COM WITHIN POSTS UNLESS OTHERWISE STATED MAY BE USED, PROVIDED THAT FULL AND CLEAR CREDIT IS GIVEN TO EYHCS AND 15 WORDS OR LESS WITH APPROPRIATE AND SPECIFIC DIRECTION TO THE ORIGINAL CONTENT.

Day 259 – Meditation Series: Inner Heaven


 

Final Set of Pictures 037

 

Learning to let the treasures of this world go allows God to free your mind, body, and soul.  He prepares you for marriage to his power, Spirit, and love.  In focusing on your inner heaven, you find God exhibiting your earthly treasures.

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©EYHCS AND THE LATEST WORD, 2010-2014. UNAUTHORIZED USE AND/OR DUPLICATION OF THIS MATERIAL, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO YOUTUBE VIDEOS, PAPERS, AND OTHER ORIGINAL WORKS OF ART WITHOUT EXPRESS AND WRITTEN PERMISSION FROM THIS BLOG’S AUTHOR AND/OR OWNER IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED. EXCERPTS, LINKS, IMAGES THAT ARE THE COURTESY OF INDULGY.COM WITHIN POSTS UNLESS OTHERWISE STATED MAY BE USED, PROVIDED THAT FULL AND CLEAR CREDIT IS GIVEN TO EYHCS AND 15 WORDS OR LESS WITH APPROPRIATE AND SPECIFIC DIRECTION TO THE ORIGINAL CONTENT.

Day 244 – Birthing Season


9.9

Pregnancy is a metaphorical experience.

It involves conception, fertilization, gestation, and birthing.

At conception an act of connectivity occurs.

We call it fertilization when two sources join as one.

The host assumes responsibility for the new source’s survival until birth.

In the gestation stage, the host gives birth to the new source.

Metaphorically speaking, the entire process is mesmerizing.

There are growing pains.

There are sleepless nights.

There are new nutritional guidelines to follow.

There are weird cravings.

There is an increase girth.

There is an increase in metabolism.

There is an increase in mood swings.

There is an increase in cellular activity.

Judging my observations of this year, it is birthing season.

Are you ready?

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Day 235 – I Gave It All For You…


8.22

God created a world full of his mysterious glory.

Yet, we find fault with it all.

Even ourselves.

Stop blaming God for your failure to see.

Blame yourself for failure to listen.

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Day 229 – Jesus was Divergent


8.17

 

Accept no limitations and there will be no limitations set upon you.

 

 

 

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Day 221 – Definitive Success


8.9

 

Success comes when you define what success really means for you.

Your definition of success cannot be usurped, violated, or misinterpreted by anyone.

Be definitive in creating your own success.

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Day 218 – The Great Debaters


8.6

I love the movie, “The Great Debaters” for its most commonly known mantra of “We do what we have to do in order to do what we want to do”.

 

I believe this is true about everything in life.

 

 

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Day 209 – Learning II


28

Each moment we live provides an opportunity for newness, for self-discovery, and for new beginnings.  The nomad people understood the phrase, “never live in the past”.

 

 

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Day 205 – Messenger Feet


Messenger's Feet

The interesting thing about this image is it does not cover the entire feet.

Just a thought!

 

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